A Peek Into My Autistic Child’s Plate: Tips and Meal Ideas

By Jennifer Bullock

What does your kid eat? How can I get my kid to eat different things? I’m worried about their nutritional intake – what do I do?

In many of the Autism-related community groups I follow, these questions pop up daily. Many worried caregivers out there are eagerly trying to find ways to help their kids eat. 

We know that nutrition can affect learning through cognitive function, concentration, memory, mood, and motor skills. But at the same time, many of us struggle with the battle of food selectivity. We are faced with sometimes very strict aversions, or limited interest. 

Both Heather and I have our own experiences with our kids and we wanted to share our situations and what we have been able to do, and ideas for others that might want to try our tactics.

Throughout this post I will include links to recipes I have used as well as some media that may be beneficial for you as well.

In my case, my daughter (age 11) has a selective menu that thankfully spans all of the major food groups. We are blessed in many ways, but still very restricted at the same time. Around two years old, my daughter was identified as having SPD - Sensory Processing Disorder, and through my research at the time, something popped up saying that “many” kids with this often preferred food with strong flavors. This was right around the time when we were really making a lot of homemade food in bulk, and freezing (husband and I both had full time jobs and this was a time-saver.) The first meal I found to try was “Pumpkin Coconut Curry with Chicken” [Link to the 2015 recipe]. I chose this because of all the different flavors included (we did not include the cayenne pepper) plus it had pumpkin and chicken, which offer many nutritional benefits. We’d adjust the chicken as she got older (finely chopped, shredded etc) and we would make rice and mix it together before freezing cubes of the food. She loved it.

We immediately started to make a few other meals, incorporating a balance of proteins (ground beef, ground turkey, chicken), vegetables like spaghetti squash, green beans, and broccoli, and a carb as filler to extend the meal and make it more substantial- like rice or gluten-free pasta. 

Again, there are pros and cons here in my story. My daughter’s current menu is as follows:

• (homemade) Spaghetti Squash + Meatballs (Costco frozen Italian meatballs) + gluten-free macaroni pasta
• (homemade) Ground beef, mushrooms, and green beans in a garlic black bean sauce + rice
• (homemade) Chicken + Madras Lentils (Tasty Bite package) + rice
• Chicken nuggets (McDonalds if out and about, otherwise we buy Tyson tempura-battered in bulk from the restaurant supply store - these are a great McDonald’s dupe!)
• French fries (select style- McDonalds-esque, bought in bulk and then air-fried)
• (homemade) Pumpkin applesauce mini muffins - the recipe incorporates pumpkin, applesauce, Greek yogurt, and banana.
• Fruits: Banana, diced peaches/pears/mandarin oranges (fruit cups), fruit pouches, and sometimes strawberries and blueberries are acceptable.
• Yogurt: Chobani Greek yogurt with fruit flavors.
• Breakfast has been the same for .. ever? Oatmeal (with butter, cinnamon and applesauce) and two slices of SPECIFICALLY toasted (level 7!) wheat toast.
• Drinks: She only drinks whole organic milk and water.
• Rare treats when she asks - chocolate chip cookie (bakery/Starbucks/Costco style - dislikes any packaged brands) and ice cream cups (vanilla with slight chocolate swirl).

And that’s it. She has a very hard time trying anything else. The most we’ve gotten her to do is taking a bite of a bell pepper, and eating split cherry tomatoes - all thanks to the repeated influence of Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood episodes where the characters eat those exact things. Unfortunately this has not translated into her trying pizza, tacos, sandwiches, or other items mentioned on the show. 

I am not oblivious to the fact that there are a lot of kids out there that have only three items on their preferred list, that struggle daily with eating anything new, that parents are out there worried and stressed because they have to supplement with powders or shakes - even then if they are lucky their kid will tolerate those. It is a true struggle and I can see how our situation is a blessing for sure.

But I’d like to stress, for all those homemade meals, all the initial exposure was when she was very young. I’d say under 4 years old. After that, she became much more strict and even stopped eating items she had previously enjoyed - no more Cheerios or Veggie Sticks. She even liked mini Oreos for a hot minute and those are no longer on her approved list. 

So if you’re reading this and your kid is very young - please keep trying with them. Introduce everything you can. There will be obstacles and very strong aversions and obviously you know your kid best - if the smell of an item turns them away, try something else. 

Preferred food items are often referred to as “safe foods” and this carries well into adulthood. Many neurodiverse adults often stress their restrictions to specific flavors, brands, or recipes because it makes sense for them. It’s comforting, it’s tasty, easy to make - whatever the case may be. So looking at your young child who only likes certain foods – honor it as much as you can. For us, we make sure we have her favorite foods on hand. We make sure to make batches upon batches of her mini muffins because she devours them like no other and you can’t buy them at any store. 

But as other parents often do, I wish my child would eat more things. Going out to a restaurant is almost unheard of for us because we either have to bring her food (some places get testy about that) or feed her before but make sure they have the approved-style of fries available, and we also have to hurry with our meal because time is ticking for how long our daughter will tolerate others eating around her. (Layers of issues here - but back to just the food for now…)

So what can you do? What might help your situation?

If you like diving into books, one that was suggested to me many years ago is: Just Take A Bite by authors Lori Ernsperger, Ph.D., and Tania Stegen-Hanson OTR/L, and includes a forward by Temple Grandin.

A tactic I would personally avoid is withholding a preferred food item as a reward for trying something new. They’re safe foods for a reason, and I feel they should be honored as such. So for example, I won’t encourage my daughter to take a bite of something she is fighting me against just so she can have a French fry. That just causes a lot of harm with potential trust issues.

However, just as we often adjust our child’s homeschool activities to incorporate preferred topics, you can also leverage their favorite shows or videos for trying new food. Many children’s programming will include episodes about eating different foods or trying something new - lean into the songs or set up a day where you’re going to make the same dish. Super Simple Songs have a lot of food-related videos that could be something you utilize as well. Here is a link to one of their compilation videos of food-related songs.

Want to try making the Pumpkin Applesauce Muffins with your kiddo? First, go and grab the recipe here and then download this visual ingredient list I made. As we all know, visuals are incredibly important and helpful for our learners! 

 ** Heather shared her tips and recipes for what her student eats - check out her blog post here! **

Jennifer Bullock, Contributing Author

Homeschooling-experienced mom to a tween, non-speaking daughter, Jennifer is also Marketing Outreach Coordinator for The Autism Oasis. With 20+ years experience in marketing, advertising, and social media communications, you will see her occasionally supporting the blog and social media channels with various content related to Autism Oasis.